Fade In To Grey

Fade In To Grey
A thin fog is cast over my eyes.
Or is it cast over the atmosphere around me?
Fade Out From Grey
I’m walking up a familiar flight of stairs.
My destiny is a familiar hallway.
But there is always the slight chance that I may evaporate on the way and rematerialize on Mars.
Fade In To Grey
I’m on the dark end of the hallway.
Cobwebs litter the corners and once functional light fixtures.
Dust and decaying pray lie here, captured.
Light bends around these lines suspended by fixed points.
They are ellipses suspended in space.
It is all suspended in time.
It cannot leave the order of time.
In this moment, it is all white paper.
Drop a match to erase it.
The flame fades in its descent.
I cannot change what happens.
I cannot change the past, present, or future.
If it happened before, it will happen again.
I am only a pawn advancing the King which is us all.
By falling for others, I advance.
We advance.
Fade Out From Grey
I twist a warm key into a cold lock.
They meet and compromise.
The door falls open inwardly.
Fade In To Grey
Did that just happen?
Did what just happen?
What am I asking?
And to whom am I asking it?
Did I just say that?
Fade Out From Grey
I enter a room.
It was vacant previous to now.
I am here now.
Fade In To Grey
Is this all a dream?
Am I overcome, now, by dimethyltryptamine escaping the Pineal Gland?
Is this a philosophy?
Or is this art?
What’s the difference?
Fade Out From Grey
I step in to the thick air of the room.
I can taste the musky, uninviting presence the air has put on.
It is unpleasant, just like it planned to be.
Fade In To Grey
I hear the past.
I feel the past.
I see the past.
I smell the past.
I taste the past.
What is now?
I cannot know.
I only sense the past to what is now.
Fade Out From Grey
I enter the room cautiously.
I observe the past with my senses to predict the future which is now, to move about the room.
There is one light bulb hanging in the middle of the room.
It shines light in the room, where it can anyway.
There are four walls.
And there are eight corners.
They are painted evenly with an eggshell white.
There is a small unmade bed in the corner.
Next to it there is a stately noble desk.
It would stand out if it weren’t cluttered by envelopes, bills, pens, and assorted papers on top of it.
There are two windows, like eyes, looking out upon the rest of the world.
I approach the window in front of me to the left; not the one in front of me to the right.
I open the window.
I use it like a snorkel to escape the thick air which is drowning me.
Fade In To Grey
Is each dust particle, floating in the air, another smaller universe?
Are we a dust particle in another larger universe?
Is there a parallel to our universe?
Why do we ask these questions?
One answered question leads to a hundred new ones.
Why do we have this thirst for knowledge?
By simply writing this, I further complicate and increase the complexity of the enigma.
Fade Out From Grey
The air is too much.
It overcomes my lungs like water in a drowning person.
I step out the window, take a deep breath, and jump.
Fade In To Grey
Is there really something higher?
God?
Are we really so sure?
How strong is my faith?
How is your faith?
How do you explain the unexplainable which escapes the furthest reaches of our minds?
If I try, I fail in epically disastrous proportions.
Fade Out From Grey
I am freefalling.
I am bound by no forces but my own and gravity.
I am free.
Fade In To Grey
Why do we even care about any of this?
It is human nature.
How can this be natural?
Why do we question the unquestionable?
Fade Out From Grey
I prepare for impact.
I hardly flinch or even blink.
If you were wondering, I make the sound “thump” when I hit the sidewalk of concrete.
Fade In To Grey
Am I back?
From where am I back?
Am I sane?
Or is everyone else insane?
What is sanity judged upon anyway?
Is it night?
Is it day?
Who decides?
Do I get a say?
Fade Out From Grey
I wake dazed, stagger to my feet, and fall to the ground again while everything blacks out.
I wake again, dazed.
I stagger to my feet, helped by a small crowd which had surrounded me.
I say I am fine and that I better get going.
I continue on my way, down the crowded sidewalk.
Fade In To Grey
Am I fixed where I lie?
Or am I mobile?
Am I an amorphous object held in shape by a surrounding atmosphere?
Or am I maybe held in a shape by a selectively permeable membrane, which keeps my pressure in check?
Fade Out From Grey
I fell ten stories and emerge unscathed after impact.
I seem fine, as I walk about.
I am fine.
Or am I?
Fade In To Grey
I bleed the tears of humanity.
They drip down one by one.
The tears gather to form creeks and rivers.
They feed into the oceans of the world.
Our tears are salty, as the ocean is salty.
Do you see the connection?
I’ve spelled it out for you.
Fade Out From Grey
I walk down the streets.
I am a mere passerby.
People dot the sidewalk I traverse, and the windows high above in a wide open sky.
Where do I go next?
I’ve explored part of my own life.
Do I explore you next?
The horizon in front of me is wide open with endless possibilities that I don’t control.
So just let me know, what happens next?